Thursday, July 31, 2008

Peanut Ramblings

I only get to see Peanut once a week during the summer.  Every Thursday The Crew and I look forward to her arrival.  She is a smart and spunky 3 year old and really adds to the fun at homebase.  Today I thought I would write down some of the things she says during the day.  Peanut really comes through with some hum-dingers...

(After getting on the see-saw opposite of a very hyper Dude)- "I don't think this is such a good idea for me".

(At 10:00 AM)- "After lunchy I am still going to be hungry".

(Outside with her friends in the sprinkler)- "I play watersplash games in my tub".

(Out of the blue)- "Do you know what my family calls me when I toot?  Tootie McTooterson!".

Thanks Peanut, you make everyones day a little bit more colorful! :)

Welcomeburger Part Deux

I thought I would give everyone a visual of Welcomeburger last night.  The Chamber of Commerce did a bang-up job organizing the entire event.  It was a fun way to meet some new people and spend a Wednesday evening.  See for yourself...

Here I am with a cheesy grin on my face.  I debated to even put this on the blog but couldn't resist when I saw the Lincoln-Douglas fountain in the background.  Cool eh?

And if I have to suffer with a picture of myself on the Internet, so does Frankie.  Isn't she purty?
I had a picture of just her cleavage, but I am trying to keep this a PG-13 blog...maybe next time.

Beer, beer and more beer...

Wednesday, July 30, 2008


Tonight Starchy and I are going out.  

We are attending "Welcomeburger".  

No, I am not joking, that is what its really called.  It is a gathering in the center of our dinky rural town hosted by the Chamber of Commerce.  Although I have lived here since 2004, tonight will be when I lose my Welcomeburger virginity.

Apparently there is beer (good) and burgers (obviously) but what I am most looking forward to is the people watching!  

I come from a LONG line of people watchers.  

My grandma is so in-tune with her people watching skills that I think if she tried really hard, she could burn a hole in someones forehead.  When Starchy met her for the first time, he nicknamed her "The Hawk" (no joke, he said she didn't blink or take her eyes off him for two straight hours).  The woman doesn't miss a beat.

And my mom is the junior version...a mini-hawk of sorts (although she has more tact and doesn't stare at someone across the dinner table like grandma).  

My mom and her girlfriends came up with this game when they were sitting at the beer gardens at MY hometown carnival.  The game is called "Perfect 10".  The objective is to find a person, (they can be young or old, male of female) that embodies gorgeousness/fabulousness/charisma.  
I should point out here, that this game is really hard.  

Most of the time you can find 8's and occasionally you can find a 9, but it is rare.  The person cannot have a gorgeous face but poor style.  They cannot have a great body, but have nappy hair.  They cannot walk confidently but have heinous shoes or gaudy make-up.  

In order to be scored a 10, the person must be the total package.

At Welcomeburger tonight I shall have a beer in one hand and my camera in the other.  I will do my family proud and hone in on my hawk-eye skills.  I shall be on the quest for the elusive "perfect 10".  

After taking in all of the sights if I do, in fact, find a "Perfect 10" you'd better believe I will snap a picture and report back.

Wish me luck!


While Welcomeburger was fun, the elusive "Perfect 10" was not located.  

Frankie (my garage sale partner in crime) and I had a blast and definitely got our money's worth at both the food and the beer tent.  We kept a roving eye on the crowd at all times, but the best we saw was an "8".  

I plan on having my camera with me during the Riverfest activities this weekend.  I will be people watching and updating if I should see anything of note!

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Nakie on the pot

Can someone explain to me why The Dude insists on taking ALL of his clothes off when he goes to the bathroom?

Over the past few days I have noticed him taking an unusually long time in the bathroom.  He has always been rather quick to do his duty and be done with it.  My curiosity was piqued, so I have been looking in on him (every time I do he says with just a hint of attitude "Mom, can you please close the door, I need some private time").

Every time he goes #2, he has to strip naked BEFORE sitting on the pot.  Now I can understand taking your bottoms and underwear off.  But why does one need to take of their socks and shirts to take a poo?

Is this a boy thing?  A kid thing?  Or just a little idiosyncrasy of The Dude's?  Any other naked poopers out there?

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Ice Cream & Booty Dance

We had another great Saturday (which is beginning to be some what of a theme this summer, I am starting to sound like a broken record!).  

I worked my tail off this morning, ridding every corner of the house of the giant dust bunnies that have been giving me nightmares.  Starchy, continued to paint our old house, in the hopes that we can put it back on the market soon.

The kids played with the neighbors all morning and then took a 3 hour nap (God Bless 'em!).  

We had burgers and corn on the cob for dinner (or "supper" for the Canadians).  I am not kidding when I say, the corn on the cob eating was quite a display.  The Dude had 5 ears of corn! It was like those old cartoons where the beaver saws through the log on one second flat, the kid just couldn't eat it fast enough.  A one point the corn was flying half way across the table.  There is really no polite way to eat corn on the cob (I think that is what makes it so fun).  

Just don't ask HP if she wants corn.  She did the old, lick and sniff and while pushing her plate away declared, "I can't love it".

After dinner, we had some ice cream (because there is really no better way to end the day).  I made the kids eat in the garage (hey, my floors were squeaky clean, I wanted to enjoy it for more than 30 seconds!).  

Here are the kids in all their glory (don't mind The Dude's nipple and belly button tattoo's...he is trying to start a new trend)!

As The Dude was chowing on his ice cream he started to do this booty dance in the driveway.  Do you think this is what the neighbors had in mind when we moved in across the street?  We definitely add some spice to the passersby! 

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Monday, July 21, 2008

Sissy likes Berries & Cream

In the two months that I have been blogging, I've found a new blog-obsession.  Her name is The Pioneer Woman and she is fabulous (I have a total mom-crush!)!  She posts all about cooking, gardening, photography and all about her life on a cattle ranch.  I highly advise you to check out the site, just don't blame me if you can't stop yourself.

One of her recipes (which are posted with pictures for the visual learner in all of us) was for this rich looking cream.  It is basically unflavored yogurt, whipping cream and brown sugar.  

Let me just say, it is TO DIE FOR!

No joke.  It is smooth, creamy and the perfect accompaniment to fresh fruit.

Because I love The Crew, I made it for them this morning.  

Let me just say, it went over like a fart in church.  

All of the kids, with the exception of Sissy, turned their little noses in the air and wanted NOTHING to do with it.  

Miss. Thang commented "this isn't yogurt...yogurt comes from the store".    

HP was worse.  She looked at it, sniffed it and then pushed it away declaring "I can't love this".

So, because I was dissed by all of the other "food critics", I decided to capture Sissy's obvious bliss while eating my concoction.

Thank goodness one of them (actually make that two of them, I am 100% sure Peanut would have devoured it had she been there) has a sophisticated palate.


It is rainy and stormy here today.  The crew and I have been hanging out inside watching movies (The Fox and Hound 2) and just causing a ruckus.  Everyone has been in good spirits (the popcorn mid-morning probably had something to do with it).

We have just finished our lunch and like every other day, nap follows.  All of the kids are on their cots with their respective blankies, butchies and loveys.  

As a newbie blogger I have found that I am looking at conversations between the kids and I, with a different perspective.  If one of the kids says something particularly funny or offbeat, I try to remember it so share with everyone when I have a chance to post.  

This conversation took place mere moments ago...

The Dude (after getting up off his cot and coming over to me)- "Mama, I have a big problem".

Me- "What's going on Dude?"

The Dude- "Its my eyes.  They I can't go to sleep".

Me- "Maybe your eyes hurt because you are tired.  I bet if you got on your cot and closed your eyes they would start to feel better".

The Dude- "No.  I already tried that.  When I close my eyes they press out (he pushes on his eyelids for dramatic effect) and I am scared if I push them too hard, they will come out the other side".

Me- "Huh?"

The Dude- (getting irritated at my apparent eyeball ignorance) "You know!  If your eyes push out they could come out the other side!".

Me- "Get back on your cot little man".

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Grape Nostrils

Starchy is out of town tonight, so the kids and I had to fend for ourselves.  

After preparing a gourmet dinner (of Spaghettio's and string cheese) the kids and I settled in for the night.  HP and The Dude were in the playroom watching Sponge Bob and I was in the living room watching Dirty Jobs.  

After a few minutes The Dude came to me and said that he was still hungry (understandably since I had only covered two of the five major food groups) so I got him a bowl of red grapes.  

After ushering him back to his beloved bean bag chair, I settled in to watch Mike Rowe (my secret crush) in his latest escapades.  

Imagine my surprise when I was interrupted with...

"Hey Mama!   Watch this!"

Suction at its finest!  The Dude could do both nostrils or just one (talk about talent!).  

I know I am biased, but I think this kid is destined for great things.  

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Wordless Wednesday

Jellyfish 101

This morning, we took advantage of the nice weather and got out the sidewalk chalk.  The girls really got in to it, and since Gramma D recently sent us a big bucket of chalk, there was enough pink to go around (it could get nasty if we run out of the chosen color...I mean, how can you draw a princess with no pink?).

The Dude was off on his own, and luckily, I started snapping pictures as he set off to create this masterpiece.  Thanks to imovie on my computer, I was able to make this little ditty (not to brag or anything, but I am pretty damn proud of myself).  I think it is priceless!


Monday, July 14, 2008

So Hot!

The Crew and I went for a long walk this morning.  The little ones (Sissy and The Drooler) loved it.  They were crusin' in a double stroller and having a good ol' time (although, looking back, they were shaded and rather cushy in their spots...and they couldn't really complain if they wanted to).

The three older ones (Miss. Thang, HP and The Dude) weren't so content.  

Granted it was sunny and getting warmer by the second.  But the three of them turned on the dramatics like I have never seen.  You would have thought I was making them run a marathon in the Sahara (instead of a walk around the block).  

The Dude was shirtless (his new favorite summer thing to do) and asked me to stop at least 5 times so he could use my shorts as a backscratcher (visual: like a grizzly bear using a tree to scratch his back).  I am sure the neighbors thought we were straight out of a traveling freak show.  

Miss. Thang was convinced she was going to melt.  No, I am not kidding.  She kept running to the shade like she was some sort of human Popsicle who might melt from sun exposure, all the while yelling to me "Rikki, I think I am MELTING!" (I should note the temperature when we left was 72 degrees, and we were probably outside for MAYBE 30 minutes).

HP was all about finding a drink.  She is still working on enunciating her words and it came out sounding like either "Mommy, I'm really firsty" or "I want a dink of water".  Either way, hilarious.

Anyways, we survived the walk and after cooling off with the garden hose (and getting a "dink") the kids actually played in the backyard for another 30 minutes (they are so fickle).

When I deemed it was time to come in, I snapped these pre-lunch photo's.  I think the kids in my care are some of the cutest around.

Don't you? :)

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Swimming Skills

As most of you know from the Hemorrhoid Chronicles, I come from a swimming background.  Hemmy was very good.  He represented Canada in the 2004 Athens Olympics (I try to slip that into conversation wherever possible) :).  So you can imagine that I want swimming to be a part of my kids life.  Up until this summer, swimming has been recreational for the kids, with the odd swim tip thrown in for good measure.  

Today The Dude made major headway.  He swam the width of the pool, in the deep end, without assistance (floaties etc.).  It was a great first step in becoming a safe swimmer and we whooped and hollered his accomplishment.  His next goal?  Walking on water...

HP is in the "putting your face in the water" phase.  She flat-out ignores any suggestions I give her, and would rather float around the pool on a lounge mat.  This is her feeble attempt at putting her face in the water (even though she has done it numerous times before).  Such a little stinker...

Friday, July 11, 2008

Bear Down!

I love the Chicago Bears.

I love football season and all the hoopla that comes with it.  

Our family gets so excited about football we plan each game as if it is our last, starting early in the morning on football Sunday's (usually with Bloody Mary's and Hot Eggs...yum).  We take turns watching the game at each others house, and no Bears game is complete without enough food and drink to feed an army.

Over the past few years we have accumulated quite a bit of Bears paraphernalia.  The kids both have their own jersey's.  Starchy and I have t-shirts and sweatshirts.  Basically, any given Sunday in the fall, you will find our family in head-to-toe orange, white and navy.

A couple of days ago, The Drooler  had saturated the bib his mum and dad sent him with, so I lent him one of ours.

It happened to be a Chicago Bears bib.

His mum chuckled to herself when she picked him up and said to The Drooler "I don't think your Daddy is going to like that bib".

This is what he came to daycare wearing the NEXT day.  

So, The Drooler's dad is a Steeler's fan and I know Peanut's mom is a Packer's fan.  This is going to make for a fun football season this year!  GO BEARS!

Tutu & Crocs

HP has always had her own sense of style.  I know, when they're little, it is the parents that choose out the outfit, but since she was a toddler, HP has always had a strong opinion about her apparel.

Take this morning for instance.  She started the day out with her favorite stand-by "comfy shorts and a comfy shirt".  Only, once the day got in full swing, she decided to glam it up a bit (although now looking back, she was probably went upstairs to take a hit off the butter spray).  

The following pictures are how she looked this morning playing outside with Miss. Thang and The Drooler...

Spray Crack

My kids are weird.  Not the kids I watch day-to-day (although they all have their moments).  I am talking about the two mini-freaks who share the same last name as me.  

HP and The Dude are both food sneakers.  What do I mean by food sneakers you ask?  I mean, even though we feed them three solid meals a day, and snacks when they need a bit to tide them over, they still raid the fridge when I am not looking.  

I know this is not terribly uncommon (I remember as a youngster eating Duncan Hines frosting straight out of the can while hiding in my closet), but my kids don't go for the sweet "off-limits" stuff.  

They go for the spray butter.

I kid you not.  Both of them have been caught multiple times in the past few days with their grubby little hands clutching a bottle of "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter" spray.

The Dude is more crafty.  He at least tries to hide it.  Yesterday he went upstairs to "change his shorts".  When the little bugger came back down, he had a light yellow smudge on his chin.  Yep.  Busted.  I even made him breathe on me and it smelled like movie popcorn.  When I asked him why he insisted on eating spray butter, he replied (with puppy dog eyes no less)  "I just really like butter, mom".  

HP on the other hand flaunts her spray butter addiction right out in the open.  There will be times when we are watching TV at night and she will just waltz into the room with her lips around the butter, just spraying away.  It is so gross.

I may have to put the spray butter under lock and key, unless anybody else has any better suggestions!

Sunday, July 6, 2008

Starchy vs. The Camera

This past Thursday, Starchy and I had a night out.  

We went to the horse tracks with Starchy's parents, siblings and their significant others.  The evening was wonderful.  We all did a little betting, we admired the horses, we at some food, drank some drinks, you know, the usual.   And because we knew some people, who knew some people (wink, wink), we got to ride in the pace car on the track (talk about a trip, I was so close I could see up the horses nostrils).  

I had my handy-dandy camera with me and got a few good shots in.  Like this one, of me, with my winning ticket (I think I came out $1.50 ahead on this one, whoo-hoo!).

And this one here.  Meggie doing her best "sexy face" imitation (not a bad job if I don't say so myself!)

And Brina, chewing his food, keeping to himself when I holler his name and snap his picture right there at the table.  I know, where are my manners?

And then we have Starchy and his two siblings.  For the entire night they tortured me.  Not one of them would pose nicely for the camera so that I could have photo's from our night at the races.  No.  Instead I got these.  The three biggest corks on the planet.  See for yourself...

The 4th in Pictures!